Friday, June 10, 2005

Not soon enough ...

TILT!!

The last treatment of this high-dose cycle can't come soon enough. Last night the collective unit that makes up ME, physically, reached her limits. I've been in a fog for about 48 hours now, I'm clumsy, my limbs feel week, my digestive system doesn't know what to do and sleep is fitful. I don't even have the words for it all but it feels awful, kids.

Yesterday I knew my white blood cell count would be low. Now that I know what it "feels" like, I was expecting it. Still my body knows how to throw me for a loop by coming to a completely new low. Two days until my treatment is over and my blood counts fell all that way across the board for the first time. ALL OF THEM....

Man was I pissed! Not sad, but angry. Two days, damnit!! Just two treatments, we can do this! Please don't send me HOME!

The compromise Dr. Butler and I came to: 10 MIU for Thursday and Friday. That was a compromise that I was willing to take. Give me something, anything to finish up this cycle ....

Today, right now, I don't know how I am going to handle 10 MIU units more. Tonight is going to suck but at least at 5PM today, the "high-dose" cycle will be over.

----
By the numbers: Holly's Blood Counts (Week 4, Intron-A)

NORMAL RANGE / Holly on MONDAY / Holly on THURDAY

Red Blood Cells
4.0 - 6.20 / 4.25 / 3.68

Hemoglobin
11.0 - 18.0 / 12.5 / 10.8

White Blood Cells
4.0 - 11.0 / 4.3 / 2.1

Nuetrophils
1.2 - 6.8 / 1.92 / 0.55
-----
I CAN DO ANYTHING FOR ONE MORE DAY!

2 comments:

Michelle said...

Hang in there, Holly! It's just like any endurance race - you hit a hard patch and have to work through it. But you will be finished with this part soon!!

nancytoby said...

Holly, those blood counts are downright pitiful. No wonder you feel like crap! After childbirth and a lot of bleeding I was down about 2 pints of blood and I couldn't walk 3 steps without holding on to the wall. Even holding on to the wall it was one step at a time. But the good news is that as soon as your blood levels bounce back you'll feel like a new woman! Just take it REAL EASY and those cancer cells are HISTORY!!!!