Monday, August 07, 2006

The most hated woman in the house....

For about 2 minutes every day this week, Wallace will *HATE* me.


He has a little kitten cold (which I am happy to say I did not give him!! The Vet said that is not possible) and the Vet prescribed him 1/4 of a dose of a pill, twice-a-day....

Have YOU ever tried to give a cat a pill? A pill that he is not allowed to chew?

Yesterday is was pretty easy to do, it was new and Wallace had no idea what we were doing and it was two against one, Humans Win! This morning it was one-on-one and proved to be tramatic for both of us. I figured if I gave it to him just before I fed him for the day, he would forget quickly. I even put some cat food juice on the "handy dandy pill popper stick" that the vet gave us. It took 3 attemps and much complaining, from both Wallace and myself AND I have to do it again tonight when I get home.

So I went on-line to see if I could find any better "suggestions" on how to give my kitten this pill twice a day and I found the following - I think I may have to wait until Jim get's home from his work travel do continue treatments .... ENJOY!


1. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as though holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to his cheeks. Cat will then close mouth and swallow.

2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Repeat the process.

3. Retrieve cat from bedroom and throw soggy pill away.

4. Remove second pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open, and push pill to back of throat with forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of 10, if you are able. Hold cat's mouth closed as well.

5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call for assistance.

6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, immobilizing front and rear paws. Ask assistant to hold cat's head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into cat's throat. Flick pill down ruler with forefinger, and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7. Retrieve cat from living room curtain valance.

8. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and set aside for later gluing. Remove third pill from foil wrap.

9. Wrap cat in beach towel, and ask assistant to lie prone on cat with cat's head visible under assistant's armpit. Put pill in paper tube you've made for this purpose. Then, force cat's mouth open with pencil and blow.

10. Check label to make sure pill is not lethal to humans. Sip water to take taste away. Apply bandage to assistant's forearm and remove blood from carpet with soap and cold water.

11. Retrieve cat from neighbor's roof. Remove fourth pill from foil. Place cat in cupboard, and close door on cat's neck and head outside cupboard. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with rubber band.

12. Fetch screwdriver from garage, and put cupboard door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek, and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Throw bloodied, ripped T-shirt away, and fetch another from bedroom.

13. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat.


Flo said...

Having given pills to cats that is way too accurate. Good Luck!!

Dawn - Pink Chick said...

My dog is the same way. But I managed to do it by sticking inside a peperoni or a piece of cheese. I'm pretty

XF-15DCC said...

stick it in a "pounce" treat, works for ours. Of course be fair and give the other one a plain treat......

Cliff said...

When I have to give pills to my cat, the vet taught us to do this.

Stuff the pill down the cat's throat. Close his mouth then start rubbing the throat to help the cat swallow the pill.

Cats are pretty sneaky. Sometimes they will pretend they swallow it and spit it back out.

Pem said...

Try putting the pill as far back as you can in the cat's mouth, holding his mouth closed, and blowing in his face. I think I remember this actually working to get the cat to swallow.